Water on the Brain
by Jester of Confusion
Summary: Jareth, his daughter, and another friend go to Hogwarts. There's two spaces on the teacher board that needs to be filled! THIS IS NOT A JS FIC! But Sarah is in it! Is that what you want!
1. Asking for Help

Water on the Brain

Authoress: New ideas are fun!

Jareth: You're starting a story aren't you?

Zoe: Yup, she is, better run Jareth

Jareth: Wha- What? Why?

Authoress: (smiles evilly)

Disclaimer: I don't own Labyrinth and/or Harry Potter. I wish I did though! (nothing happens) DANG!

Jareth: looks at disclaimer OH, NO! Not happening! I'm not going to do it! You can't make me. You don't own me remember?

Authoress: Good point Jareth, but….

Jareth: NO! No buts!

Zoe: I'm afraid we beat your Labyrinth and we made a deal. If we won…

Authoress: You had to be our friend slash (cough) slave.

Jareth: I'm doomed….

Chapter 1

Asking for Help?

Jareth sat on his throne contemplating what he was asked to do. Only a half a hour ago a old friend had come and asked him to fill in a employee blank (so to speak). Should he take the job? Well, he had to do that and find another person to fill in another blank.

Dumbledore had told him that the other was quite easy to fill. Jareth massaged his temples. This was making his head hurt. He already had in mind who he was going to ask. All he needed to do know was if he was going to take the position as the Defense Against the Dark Arts teachers for the next Hogwarts school year.

"You there," he pointed to a nearby goblin. The goblin stopped in his tracks, bowed clumsily, and perked his floppy ear in attention. "Go get the queen and tell her I need to speak with her," he ordered. Quickly, not wanting to anger his majesty the goblin was off.

Not five minutes later a woman appeared. She had long crimson hair and grayish green eyes. Her eyes held wisdom beyond her years. The woman had faced many different challenges. Her attire was a pale blue dress that reached the floor.

"You need to talk, love?" she asked as she smiled. He smiled back, feeling as if some of his tension was relieved. (AN: YES! He is married. If you want full explanation see bottom!)

"How about somewhere else?" he asked and eyed some goblins. The woman laughed then nodded. The two left the throne room arm in arm. They reached the library and both sat down on a dark red chaise.

"Now, what seems to be on your mind, dear?" she asked.

"Well, an old friend just appeared and asked if I could take up a spot on his staff at a mortal magic school, and also to find someone to teacher another class. I don't know if I should go or not," he finished. She sighed.

"I believe you deserve a vacation from the Goblin Kingdom. You will be a great teacher, how long would you stay?"

"Just a year, darling, I wouldn't leave you longer than that," he answered and kissed her for emphasis. She smiled when they parted.

"You should take Alexandria," she suggested.

"But she knows magic, Ginny, she was born into Fae heritage! She knows more magic than most of the children at the school," he protested.

"Yes, but that's all she knows, love," Ginny said quietly. Jareth then nodded. She was right. Women usually are (AN: No that was not a sexist comment, that is a fact). "Besides, that would give me time to focus on little Damien, he's been upset lately. You could use this time to bond with your daughter. Ruling a kingdom is not easy work, unless you say otherwise?" she raised her eyebrows in questioning.

"Why you little," Jareth swept his wife into a deep kiss to thank her for her help.

"Anytime, my love," she answered.

Alright, he knew he was going, but now he had to find the other teacher. The Goblin King walked a little ways behind the dark forest until he reached a large lake that reached about a mile wide.

He produced a crystal and threw it into the crystal clear water. A few minutes after a small creature poked his head out. The creature looked like a fairy with scaly skin and wings.

"Your majesty!" the little water dwelling fairy squeaked bowed slightly.

"Good morning, is your lady present at the moment?" he asked. The fairy thought for a moment.

"The Lady Linzel is in the water lily falls ," she told him, when he started to walk away she called to him, "Your majesty! Wait," he stopped and looked back to the little winged creature. "Careful, sir, she just got back from an argument with prince of the Great Dragon Lake, she's none to happy," she told him.

Jareth nodded his head. Better watch himself. The lady of water was never pleasant to be around when she was angry. He walked back into the dark forest on a different path. He soon came to a waterfall running into a small lake.

He heard cursing and talking. He looked up to a large rock sitting next to the lake. On top was a woman pacing. She had a green one strap (over the shoulder) dress-like tunic that went down to her knew. The whole outfit had a ragged look to it. Around her waste was a green sash that held a small bag.

"I never understood why you don't like Tulcan," Jareth said loud enough so the woman could hear. The woman stopped her pacing and looked down. Seeing the Goblin King she jumped off the rock and into the water. Her head then poked out of the water. Then her whole body seemed to float. She was standing on the water, her body completely dry. She walked across the glossy surface , dodging lily pads here and there.

As she walked past him she threw her blonde braid over her shoulder. "I'm not in the mood Jareth. That nitwit is getting on my very last never," she said as anger flared in her water-colored eyes.

"Well how would like to get away from the nitwit? I have to go on this-," he began, but was interrupted.

"Whatever it is I'll take it!" she said simply. Jareth jaw dropped. Linzel sat under a tree picking at her sea-foam colored nails.

"You haven't even heard why! I have to asked you to teach at a mortal wizarding school in England. It's aboveground and-"

"Jareth, stop babbling! I'll take the job. I don't care! Just get me out of this place! I will leave Clair in charge while I'm gone. Just tell me what I'm teaching," she told him.

"A class called The Arts of Magic. It's a class about using your magic to create art, like dancing, painting, ect." he said.

"No wonder why you came to me. Was I your first choice?" she asked. He nodded. She got up and dusted herself off. "Alright then when do we leave?"

"Tomorrow, and Alexandria is coming with us," he informed her.

"That's great I haven't seen your daughter in ages! How's Ginny?"

"She's fine, still having trouble with Damien though," he said sadly.

"Tell Ginny that if she needs any help at all, call the sea nymphs and tell them that Lady Linzel told them. They are wonderful with children and are really sweet angels," she suggested.

"I'll tell her that," he said.

!

Authoress: There's chapter 1 for y'all.

Jareth: God help us

Authoress: OH BY THE WAY! No, that is not the same Ginny as Harry Potter. My best friend is in love with the Goblin King and she told me to put her in it as his wife. So I did.

Zoe: We don't like that the story was set up so the Goblin King was in love with Sarah.

Authoress: SHE WAS 14!!! Not to mention David Bowie was 40 when he made Labyrinth! That's not right!

Jareth: Will you both shut up now?

Authoress: R&R! No flames please, and frankly constructive critisism is an oxymoron, so none of that either. Love ya Bye!


	2. Getting Somewhere

Water on the Brain

Authoress: Wow, I can finish a chapter really quickly, but you people don't seem to like me! (sob)

Jareth: Why? Is that a good thing?

Authoress: Grrr, shut up

Zoe: Yeah she might have to kill you in the story

Authoress: I cant Zoe

Zoe: Why not?

Authoress: Though he is our slave and friend we can't kill him (watches Jareth do happy dance) Cuz he doesn't belong to us

Jareth: WHOOPEE!!

Authoress: Did you just say Whoopee?

Disclaimer: ANYWAY! I don't own Labyrinth or Harry Potter

Jareth: HA-HA!!

Authoress: BUT! I do own Linzel, Alexandria, Ginny (Jareth's Wife), and little Damien!

Zoe: SO THERE!

Chapter 2

Getting Somewhere

"Are you coming?" Jareth called impatiently on the other side of a wooden door.

"I'm not going!" a girl yelled back. "I don't want to go aboveground. I heard it was a horrible place!" Ginny scowled at the door.

"Listen here young lady I spent three years in that "horrible" place and you don't know a thing about it. You will get your spoiled princess butt out of there this instance you will go with your father to Hogwarts and you will do it all with a happy face!" with that Ginny stormed off to blow off some steam.

The door creaked open and a girl with long, curly light red hair poked her head out. Her mismatched eyes (Purple and green) found her father's. "Damien's been keeping her up hasn't he?" she asked. Jareth nodded.

"I'm afraid he is starting to affect her mood. Now, Linzel will be here any moment and when she gets here we are leaving," he said sternly. Alexandria sighed in defeat.

"As long as Linzel is going," she said. Suddenly there was a crash and some yelling in the direction of the throne room.

"She's here," Jareth said with a sarcastic tone. He walked to his throne room. When he walked in he found Linzel picking herself up. On her back was a pair of sky blue angle wings. She wore black leggings with a light blue halter top. Around her upper arms were dark blue ribbons that hung down about reaching the floor.

"That's the last time I try to fly into your windows," she muttered and held her head. After about a minute the wings disappeared. That's when Ginny entered the throne room.

"Linzel!" she walked over and hugged the slightly surprised woman. "It's so good to see you! How are you?"

"I'm fine, your grace, and you?" Linzel said when she was finally released.

"Now how many times should I tell you, call me Ginny, and I'm fine. Though I'm having a bit of a problem with Damien," she said cheerfully.

"Well if you need any assistance, call my sea nymphs they'll help," she told the queen. Ginny nodded in agreement. Linzel then faced Jareth.

"So you get the princess ready?" she asked. He looked over his shoulder and saw that his daughter's door was closed again.

"She will be," he supplied. Linzel nodded and tried not to laugh.

"I guess having children is not as easy as it seems is it?" she asked slyly.

"Neither is ruling a kingdom," Jareth muttered. The water witch rolled her eyes and sighed.

"Are we getting wands?" she asked suddenly.

"Well if I'm teaching a defense class, I better get one. Alexandria will probably get one. You?" he eyed the woman.

"If I'm doing dancing, then no, but I'm not sure. I might get one for teaching any students that want to paint," she thought for a moment. "I might as well," she shrugged. Jareth agreed and went to call his daughter again. Linzel took the moment to look around. The throne room was not very active today. There was chicken wondering around. Linzel frowned at the oddity walking around the room.

"I really don't understand why Jareth keeps those guys around," Ginny said. The water woman noticed that the queen was still in the room. She smiled to the woman of royalty.

"Comic relief?" Linzel suggested. Both people burst out laughing.

"What are two laughing about?" Alexandria asked as she entered the room with her father. The two stopped laughing.

"Sorry, we were just conversing about the local wildlife," Ginny said and pointed to the clueless chicken. Alexandria rolled her eyes.

"Are we all set?" Jareth asked the two ladies that would travel to Hogwarts with him. They both nodded. "We are going to Diagon Alley, the train station, and go from there," he informed them.

"At least that's somewhere," Alexandria muttered, then received a glare from her father. She smirked back.

"Have a nice trip," Ginny told them.

"Bye mom," Alexandria called before the three disappeared.

$&$

Three people appeared in a dark alley just next to the Leaking Cauldron. They quickly walked out of the deserted alley and entered the dusty bar.

"I never really liked bars," Linzel commented as she put the hood on her dark blue cloak down. Alexandria put the hood on her crimson cloak down and looked around.

"I'm not even old enough to be at a bar," she said with a smile. The third person put the hood of his black cloak down and looked around. Jareth's hair was tied back into a loose ponytail.

"Well, we're not staying long," he said and walked passed interested eyes. People looked to Linzel who had her trademark birthmark on her forehead. The mark was a light blue tear drop partly covered by her light blonde bangs. The trio reached the back room and Jareth threw a crystal at the wall. The wall then opened to reveal Diagon Alley.

"Ok I was wrong the Aboveground looks interesting," Alexandria admitted. Linzel looked around curiously.

"All we came here for were some wands," Jareth told them before they got any ideas. The water sprite winked to Alexandria, who returned with a mischievous smile. Spotting Olivander's the three headed in that direction.

They entered the quiet shop with wondering faces and looked around. Soon a wizened old man appeared.

"You majesties!" Olivander exclaimed and bowed slightly. The man then looked to the extra girl. He saw her birthmark and smiled. "You must be the new teachers to Hogwarts." It was more of a statement than a question.

"Yes, and we must get wands even though we are not used to using them," Jareth said. Olivander nodded with enthusiasm.

"Yes, yes we must get you wands," he said eagerly. He looked to sixteen-year-old red head and thought for a minute. "Let's see, I haven't had many Fae in centuries," he commented and went farther into the back of the shop. The three could hear humming and soon the man came back out. "Try this m'lady," he said and held out a box with a cherry wood wand inside.

"Cool," Alexandria said and picked the magical instrument up. She and the wand glowed for a moment.

"Perfect, usually don't get it on the first try," the shop keeper shrugged. "No wonder you two fit. That wands got a hair of a goblin in it. Perfect for the Goblin Princess!" Olivander said and smiled to the teen. Alexandria smiled contently. "Now for the king. Just goblin hair won't do, no it will not do," again Olivander busied himself in the back.

"This should prove interesting," Linzel commented lightly. Jareth threw her a glare before the owner came back out.

"Here we are," Olivander handed Jareth an open box. Inside was a black colored wand. Jareth picked it up out of the box. As soon as Jareth hand came in contact with the wand, the wand formed a crystal. The crystal cracked and exploded. The pieces, however, melded themselves to the wand.

"Whoa!" both Linzel and Alexandria exclaimed.

"Yes, some wands have different ways of showing they have found the right owner," Olivander said mysteriously. The shop keeper then looked to Linzel. "A water lady, what can I find for you?" he questioned himself. Going to the back, Olivander came out rather quickly with another box. He handed the box to Linzel. Linzel to the wand out.

"No," she said barely audible, "This doesn't feel right, try another," she said and handed the wand, box and all, back to Olivander.

"You're right, let me try again," he said and brought out another a few second later. Linzel took the wand out and she quickly dropped it in pain.

"I STUNG ME!" she complained and held her hand. Olivander picked up the wand and placed it back in the box.

"Sorry about that," he apologized. "Hm, this is hard. Wait I know, I've been using the wrong magic water," he sighed.

"What do you mean?" Jareth aked quizzically.

"She's a Lady of the Water, so naturally her wand must contain a magical water correct for her," he explained. Linzel wondered why the wands just didn't feel right. "Let me try one more, I think I might have just the one," he stated. Linzel smiled and nodded.

"Last time," she said as she eyed the wand he now held out to her. The wood on the handle was a very light brown that had a light blue hew to it. The wand it self was a dark blue almost black color.

"Last time," Olivander reassured her. Linzel picked up the wooden object and as her hand wrapped around the handle the birthmark on her head glowed. "That's the one," the mysterious man said.

"That's awesome," Alexandria said. Linzel looked at the wand closely.

"Olivander what's in this wand?" she asked curiously. He smiled and had a weird glint in his eye.

"The tears of a god, my dear," he answered, "The wand contains the tears of death herself. If you remember mythology, the tears of Death are best healing magic in the galaxies. They are also perfect for emotion magic, similar to dancing or art. Hold onto that wand lady, for Death only gives her tears once every 10 centuries," he said.

They paid for their wands and walked out of the spooky shop. Quickly they teleported themselves to Platform 9 ¾. No one cared that three figures had materialized out of thin air. This was, after all, the platform of the train that took new student and teachers to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry! (AN: But I think we all knew that!)

The train platform was busy with activity and practically swarming with students. Alexandria stuck close to her father. Linzel had to resist running off in curiosity.

"You must be the new teachers to Hogwarts," a voice from behind interrupted their wondering. The three turned around. A man stood behind them along with a shorter boy next to him. The man had long white hair but looked to be about in his high thirties. He held his head high.

'Talk about pride bigger than ego,' Linzel shot to Jareth. Jareth heard the comment in his head and hid a smirk.

"And you are?" Jareth started a conversation.

"Lucius Malfoy," he said and held out his hand. Jareth shook it while again hiding a smirk. Mortals are so funny sometimes. "This is my son, Draco," he said and motioned to the sixteen-year-old boy next to him. The boy had sleek blonde/white hair close to his fathers.

'Oh god, I have to go to school with rich kids?' Alexandria thought sarcastically and let the two adult near her hear it. Linzel stifled a laugh with a cough. Lucius then caught sight of the woman teacher.

"And who might you be?" he inquired with a smile (AN: Though it was an evil, over-baring, jerky, well you get the point, smile)

"Linzel Trannen," she said and bowed her head slightly. She held out her hand for him to shake. Lucius grabbed her hand and brought it to his lips.

"A beautiful name, Miss Trannen," he said.

'Is he flirting?! He has a kid! Isn't he married?!' Linzel's mind raced. It was Jareth turn to try and not laugh.

'I don't know, I believe mortals believe in divorce, so who knows?,' the king tried to compromise. Linzel shot him a glare. If looks could kill and Fae could die, then Jareth would be dead.

Draco rolled his eyes he then turned his attention to Alexandria. Jareth realized he had not introduced themselves.

"Where have my manners gone? My name if Jareth Spiritello and this is my daughter Alexandria," he introduced her. She waved but did not put out her hand, for fear of the same thing that happened to Linzel.

'You're from Italy now?' Linzel asked Jareth through their mind circuit. Jareth smirked. 'Top it off, your last name means 'goblin',' she sighed.

'And yours means 'tears' in Dutch. I didn't even know you knew Dutch,' he sent back. Linzel shrugged.

"We must be off now," Linzel said and waved goodbye to the two fair haired guys. Linzel exhaled when they were out of sight.

"I don't want to see them again, or just not the father," she admitted.

"Your lucky," Alexandria started as they walked towards the train, "I have to go to school with the son.

"We'll live," Jareth said and sighed at the though at a whole year with these two girls. Oh boy was this going to be fun.

!

Authoress: PHEW It's done!

Jareth: Finally!

Zoe: Hoped you liked it! Cuz we could care less!

Authoress: Speak for yourself! Anyway I need pairing ideas

Linzel/ Snape

Linzel/Lupin

Linzel/Sirius (BRING HIM BACK!)

Alexandria/Harry

Alexandria/Draco

Alexandria/Neville (WHAT THE HELL!)


	3. Actually Getting There

Water on the Brain

Authoress: So…..

Zoe & Jareth: (asleep)

Authoress: HEY!!

Zoe: (wakes up) THE JELLO KNOWS THE TIGHTS!

Jareth: (wakes up) I'M NOT REALLY A MAN?!

Authoress: OO

Zoe: yawn What's going on?

Jareth: scowling Disregard anything I just said.

Authoress: Yeah…

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter and/or Labyrinth. Yadda, yadda, yadda, and all that jazz. You know the drill

Chapter 3

Actually Getting There

"Here's one!" Alexandria called as she opened the door to a vacant compartment. The trio went into the compartment and got comfortable. The train started up and jerked slightly as it began to move. Alexandria stared out the window as the train got out of the station.

"Well, we're off," Linzel sighed. Suddenly the door to the compartment opened and three teenage faces looked in. One boy jet black hair and light green eyes. The girl had bushy light brown hair and brown eyes. The taller boy had bright red hair and brown eyes. (AN: Don't know if I got the hair color right. And frankly don't care). The boy with jet black hair had a lightning shaped scare on his forehead.

"Excuse us, but the other compartments are full," the girl said.

"Sure, there's enough room," Linzel said and smiled. Jareth sat next to Alexandria and the red head sat down next to him. The girl sat next to Linzel and the dark haired boy next to the girl.

"Hi, I'm Alexandria Spiritello and this is my father Jareth," she said and pointed to the man next to her. "I'm stating at Hogwarts a little late, but I know my way around magic," she said. Jareth smiled proudly. Linzel rolled her eyes.

"I'm Linzel Trannen, I'll be a new teacher at Hogwarts," she said with a smile.

"You're teaching DADA?" the girl asked.

"No that's Jareth job, I'm teaching the new optional class at Hogwarts. The art of Magic. Stupid name, I know, but it's a class that teachers student to use magic in art," she explained. "So what are your names?"

"I'm Hermione Granger," she said and shook hands with Linzel.

"Ron Weasley," Ron also shook the woman hand.

"Harry Potter," the dark-haired boy said and shook her hand. He had expected some sort of reaction but nothing came.

"Excuse me for asking Professor, but why do you have that birthmark?" Hermione asked curiously. Linzel's hand went to the mark on her head.

"Oh I forgot to cover that up, oh well, can't now," she said, "Might as well tell you," she took a deep breath. "It's a family birthmark," she lied. "My whole family has one," she said.

"So are you of some special pureblood family?" Ron asked.

"I guess, but anyone of magic is special pureblood or not," she said at noticing the sad look on Hermione's face.

'Telling lies already, Linzel? We haven't even left London,' Jareth told her. He heard a laugh ring through his head.

'Jareth, you try telling them your fae and see what happens. I'm not going to tell a bunch of under-aged wizards that I'm a lady of water and I come from the Underground! Can you imagine the look on their faces?' she responded

'It would probably be the same look dad gets when someone sees the goblin king in their room. Just another wished away child and still the same surprised face,' Alexandria thought to the two other telepaths in the compartment.

The three students noticed the silence. "So you are teaching DADA this year?" Hermione inquired to the monarch sitting across from her. Jareth nodded.

"Dumbledore asked me at the last minute," he answered. A sigh. "I also had to find the other teacher and I knew Linzel personally," he said and looked to the woman staring out the window.

"I got to tag along and see what Hogwarts is really like," Alexandria said with a smile. The trolley then rolled by and the three students plus one newbie all bought various candies. Linzel would steal some from Alexandria sometime.

"Hey Alexandria can I see your wand?" Harry asked.

"Sure," Alexandria took out her wand and handed it to Harry.

"Cool, what's got in it?" he asked.

"A goblin hair," she told him. "What's in yours?"

"A phoenix feather," he answered.

"Beautiful creatures phoenixes," Linzel said not really paying attention. "Their repetition of life always reminds me of something," she said aloud. 'The Underground,' she then thought to herself.

The train rode on towards it's destination and the people in the compartment conversed with each other. It wasn't long before it pulled into the station and students were piling out.

"Bye you guys, I have to go check in with my father!" Alexandria called then followed Linzel and Jareth towards Dumbledore, who was standing at the other end of the platform, away from the rest of the students.

"Jareth," Dumbledore said and bowed slightly. Jareth also bowed in returned. Dumbledore then turned to Linzel. "Ah, I see we have found our other teacher, you my dear are?"

"Linzel Trannen," she said and bowed too.

"Dumbledore, I brought my daughter along to get a taste of Aboveground magic if you don't mind," Jareth asked.

"Oh not at all!" Dumbledore exclaimed and smiled down at the girl. "Welcome princess, I hope you enjoy your stay," he said. She smiled back at him. "Now we must get to the great hall, before I am missed," they headed inside and took a side door into the great hall.

As soon as they were seated Professor McGonagall started the sorting of the first years. Jareth sat to the headmaster's right, next to him his daughter, and Linzel sat next to Alexandria. The students whispered a littler at spotting the new people. Alexandria waved to Harry, Ron, and Hermione. They waved back enthusiastically.

"Zellith, Terry," called McGonagall. This was the last first year.

"Hufflepuff!" yelled the raggedy hat. Linzel looked to Jareth.

'Talking hats? Geez, I though I've seen it all in your Labyrinth,' she sent him. It was her turn to hear laughter.

'What about the old man and his talking hat?' he questioned. Linzel stifled a laugh. 'Forgot about him, didn't you?' Linzel nodded.

She then noticed two people standing in the back. One was a battered man, who looked like he'd been working a long time (Filtch) . The other was a woman to be about mid-twenties. She had long dark brown hair. She was talking to the caretaker at the moment and Linzel couldn't see her face.

McGonagall was starting to take the sorting hat away when Dumbledore stopped her, "I have a few announcements before we start the feasting. First we have two new teachers this year. One for the Defense Against the Dark Arts and the other for the weekend optional class, The Art in Magic," he announced.

'Thanks Jareth, you made me think it was a stupid name, GRR, now I have to remember the name,' Linzel vented in Jareth's mind. He shrugged and apologized to her.

"Jareth Spiritello will be taking the DADA position and Miss Linzel Trannen," they both stood and nodded to the clapping students. "Professor Spiritello has also brought his daughter along to witness Hogwarts fine magic school. So every student will be on his/her best behavior. The rules are the same as always. Now, I think it proper that Miss Spiritello be sorted, for if she were to get points her house should get points also," Dumbledore suggested. The students cheered.

"Go for it, princess," Linzel whispered to Alexandria. Alexandria stood and went around the table to the sorting hat. She picked it up, sat down on the stool, and put the old hat on her head.

'Mm, Fae royalty here's a new one,' the hat spoke in her head. 'Pureblood Fae too, how about,' "SLYTHERIN!" the hat shouted and the Slytherin table erupted in cheers. She mouthed a 'sorry' to the golden trio sitting at the Gryffindor. She took off the hat handed it to Professor McGonagall and sat down next to her father again.

"Now that, that's settled I'd also like to introduce you to our new nurse, Miss Sarah Williams," Dumbledore announced and pointed to the woman in the back. Jareth stopped breathing and Alexandria had to hold herself from laughing. Linzel raised her eyebrow as she looked at Sarah's face. She was surprised to say the least, but not scared. For one reason, the Goblin King had married her best friend.

!

Authoress: HAHAHAHA rolling on floor with laughter

Jareth: What's so funny?!

Authoress: I wish I could see that look on your face in that scene.

Zoe: FYI you might want to read her other story 'Cold Winter' where it explains all.

Authoress: In that story the main character is Ginny (Not HP character). She was a bounty hunter, who was assigned by Jareth to watch over Sarah. In time she became best friends with Sarah. Sarah got married, Ginny's job was terminated, and she then went to work in Jareth's castle at the nursery. They slowly fell in love and Sarah was somehow not invited to the wedding. I kinda ended the whole story at where Jareth and Ginny say the love each other. So I didn't get to the wedding. Now you know the rest of the story! GOODAY!

Zoe: Oh thanks for the ONE REVIEW!! GEEZ!! You people don't always have to have J/S pairings!

Authoress: As for the one reviewer thanks, you at least got me to keep the story.

Jareth: Pairings so far:

Alexandria/Harry 0

Alexandria/Draco 0

Alexandria/Neville 1 (YOU GO BOY!)

Authoress: You guys are getting beat by Neville!

Draco & Harry: (Glare) Shut up

Linzel/Snape 0

Linzel/Sirius 0

Linzel/Lupin 1 (ALRIGHT!)

Authoress: REVIEW PLEASE! I'M BEGGING!!

Zoe: You don't do that often enough

Authoress: Shut up


	4. Settled Yet?

Water on the Brain

Authoress: Oh I ROCK!

Zoe: How's that?

Authoress: Two chapters in one day!

Jareth: Whoop-de-shit no one cares

Authoress: I do and all my adoring fans do!

Audience: (asleep) (crickets chirping)

Authoress: Not funny (tumbleweed rolls by)

Zoe: Yeah it is.

Disclaimer: I still don't own Labyrinth or Harry Potter. What else is new?

Chapter 4

Settled Yet?

"Prefects, please lead the students to the dormitories," Dumbledore told them. The students filed out the great hall and the giant room became very silent. Some of the teachers also left.

A soon as most of the teachers were gone Alexandria and Linzel burst out laughing. Sarah stood at the exit of the hall just watching them in amusement. Jareth scowled.

"What's so damn funny?" he asked sharply. Alexandria wiped the tears from her eyes. She then tried to catch her breath. The two people, beside the four main characters, left in the room (Snape and Dumbledore) just watched with curious faces.

"Sorry, father, but it is kinda funny and coincidental that mom's best friend and the girl that beat your Labyrinth is the new nurse at Hogwarts," Alexandria then burst into another fit of laughter. Sarah walked up to them with a smiled on.

"At least Ginny treats her husband better than the daughter," Sarah said to the younger girl. Alexandria composed herself and looked to Sarah. Jareth raised and eyebrow.

"She misses you," the teen said with a sad smile.

"I bet as much as I miss her, how is she? I see she's raised a beautiful daughter," Sarah said. Alexandria blushed at the comment. "But the king must have a son and the older daughter must have an annoying younger brother," she said slyly. Jareth smiled.

"Yes, I have a son, but he has been quite a hassle for Ginny lately. That's why I stole Alexandria and took her with me," Jareth explained. "His name is Damien and this is my daughter-,"

"Alexandria Jewel," Sarah finished for him. "Come, come Jareth, Ginny still writes as much as she can," she answered his surprised face. "And you must be Professor Linzel, how did Jareth talk you into teaching hear?"

"Blackmail," Linzel answered and all three girls laughed. Somebody cleared their throat and they turned to Dumbledore and Snape.

"I believe we should get you two professors rooms," Dumbledore said. Linzel and Jareth nodded. "As for Alexandria, you have a choice: you can stay in a room close to your father's or you can sleep in the Slytherin dormitory," he gave her, her to choices. She thought for a moment.

"I'll stay in the dormitory, I'll meet more people that way," she answered.

"Professor Snape will escort you to your dormitory," Dumbledore said. Snape motioned to leave and Alexandria followed.

'Behave,' both Jareth and Linzel said to her.

'Like always,' Alexandria shot back before leaving the great hall.

"Well, it looks like Miss Williams and you know each other, your highness," Dumbledore said with a mischievous glint in his eyes. At this Linzel started laughing again.

"Will you cut that out, or I'll ask Tulcan to come and visit," Jareth threatened. Linzel then grew very serious.

"YOU WOULDN'T!" she practically yelled.

"He would," both Sarah and Dumbledore said at the same time.

"Why you little-," Linzel began.

"I think it's about time we turn in, isn't it?" Sarah interrupted.

"That's a good idea," Dumbledore urged.

"Fine, but not before," Linzel started and materialized a crystal, much like Jareth, only it was sea blue. She threw it at Jareth before he could react. He disappeared with no glitter or lights. "Payback you arrogant king," with that she left the great hall. Jareth reappeared. He robes were soaked and is hair was completely flat.

"That little witch of sprite," he growled.

"You mean she's not a witch?" Sarah asked curiously, "And why are you all wet?"

"She threw me into the lake, and no," he magically dried himself off, "She is of Fae and of Sprite kind," he explained. "She rules of the waters of the Underground. Good thing that does not include the Bog," Jareth said and left the hall too, to get some well deserved rest.

"It's going to be a long year," Dumbledore sighed.

"That's only the half of it, headmaster. I'll keep the infirmary open just in case those two decide to kill each other," with that, the new nurse for the year walked off to her room.

"This may turn out to be another exciting year at Hogwarts," Dumbledore said to no one. He smiled mysteriously and went to his room.

#

"WAIT UP!" a voice called to the three students walking to their DADA class. They turned around to see Alexandria running after them. She wore plain black robes (ironically nowhere on the robe were the symbols of Slytherin).

"Hey Alexandria, you do know you don't have to attend classes right?" Hermione asked. Alexandria nodded with a smile.

"I wouldn't miss my fathers first lesson," she said and continued walking with the three. Soon a boy with brown hair and green eyes ran up to the group.

"Harry, did you remember the password?" the boy asked.

"Sure Neville, it's 'toadstools'," he answered. Harry noticed Neville was looking at the new girl. "Oh, Neville this is Alexandria. Alexandria this is Neville Longbottom," Harry introduced the two. Alexandria smiled to him and held out her hand. He shook it and blushed slightly.

"It's nice to meet you Neville," she said. She could tell the boy had not had good luck in the past. When she shook his hand, she put a little charm on him for good luck. The five teenagers then entered the classroom. Alexandria stood in the back. Linzel snuck in before the class started.

I have to explain a little about the class. Dumbledore explained some to Linzel this morning. The class was to take place on Saturdays, which was slightly unusual. It was a optional class for higher credits at the end of the year. It also gets you better job openings to be diverse in the magic world.

Anyway, Alexandria and Linzel stood in the back watching as Jareth walked out in front of class. 'Better than goblins, huh Jareth?' Linzel asked him.

'While in the middle of teaching I would like you two to keep you thoughts to yourself,' he shot at the two telepaths in the back. They tried to stop from giggling. This was going to be a long year.

####

Authoress: YAY FINISHED!!

Zoe: FINALLY!

Jareth: AMEN!

Authoress: Ungrateful, slimy, idiotic, little b-

Zoe: Let's get to the reviews and votes shall we?

Jareth: YES!

Authoress: (grumbling)

Zoe: Thank you guys for reviewing.

Alexandria/ Harry 0

Alexandria/ Draco 1

Alexandria/ Neville 1

Zoe: He may be wonder boy but he aint doing so well

Jareth: Not to mention he's the main character.

Harry: (Glare)

Draco: (looks to Neville) Never knew you had it in you

Neville: Damn straight!

Authoress: Did he just-

Zoe: Yes, now respond to the other votes.

Authoress: I was a little confused, but let me get this straight

Linzel/ Lupin 2

Linzel/ Sirius ½ ?

Linzel. Snape 0

Jareth: Half?

Authoress: A reviewer suggested that Linzel be with Sirius, have him cheat on her, then have her be with Lupin. I can do but I will probably have to have them have history together. I need more reviews to decide on this. HELP!

Zoe: Yeah, you need serious help. HA get it 'serious' 'Sirius'?

Audience: (silence)

Authoress: I'm no expert Zoe, but that usually means 'no'

Zoe: Shut up!

Jareth: R&R Peoples!


	5. Having Fun Yet?

Authoress: FINE I WONT DO OUTTAKES!!

Zoe: What the he-

Jareth: She's pissed

Authoress: I did outtakes on LOTR and Fanfiction.net didn't like it

Zoe: They kicked you off?

Authoress: For about a week. BUT I'M BACK!!

Jareth: Oh joy (sarcasm)

Authoress: (glare)

Zoe: Well that little soap opera is over.

Disclaimer: Don't own squat! YOU HAPPY FF.net?!

Jareth: You might have to say that louder. I don't think they heard you in SCOTTLAND!

Zoe: What's with all the screaming?

Authoress: JUST START THE FIC!!

Chapter 5

Having Fun Yet?

The first day started and ended rather strangely. Jareth had introduced himself to all the students and told them a little about all they would be learning this year. Only one thing really stuck in their minds, though. They would be learning about Fae and their ability to use magic without a wand at all.

Linzel had left after the first class was over. Alexandria stayed behind to help her father get some things in order. The water maiden walked down the silent corridors with grace, poise, and…… boredom. She sighed.

"I have to wait for my class. This is so not right. Saturday? Who ever head of a class that took place on Saturday?" she said out-loud to no one, but someone answered.

"I have," a male voice answered. Linzel swung around to see two men. One with dirty blonde hair, they other, a ghost! She frowned slightly.

"Oh, who asked you?" she huffed and began walking again.

"Well, technically, you did," the ghost replied. In life he would've had jet black hair and dark brown eyes, but as a ghost the colors seemed faded or paler. He wore a shabby coat and he looked tired somehow.

"That…I… um… oh you're are as bad as Jareth!" she growled and turned to face the two with a glare.

"Jareth?" the blonde asked. He wore a red outfit, not robes. His blue seemed to reflect curiosity. (AN: I have no idea if I'm getting the eye/hair colors right, but throw me a bone here.)

"He's the new DADA teacher," the ghost provided. The blonde shook his head. Linzel rolled her eyes, turned, and began to walk away again.

"But I know that name," the blonde said. Linzel stopped dead (AN: Excuse the pun) in her tracks.

"What?" Linzel asked, but did not turn around.

"Yeah, my older brother (AN: I OWN HIM, if he ever shows up…) use to tell me stories about Jareth, the….oh…. What was it?" he thought for a moment. The ghost looked thoroughly bored and began to float in circles. Linzel did turn around and prayed he didn't remember. "I remember! It was Jareth the Goblin King!" he said.

"Why did you have to go and do a stupid thing like that?!" Jareth appeared out of no where. Glitter flew around him. (AN: The technical term for this is POOFING!)

The ghost floating circles stopped and was no longer bored. He looked at the man that had just apparated (AN: Sp?) on Hogwarts school grounds. The blonde's eyes were slightly larger than usual. Linzel felt like hit her head on a wall, very hard.

"Which one of you did it?" Jareth asked impatiently. Lucky for him he didn't have a class the period. (AN: Can you call it that at Hogwarts? Ok I'll stop interrupting!)

"Why?" Linzel asked. "You gonna turn them into goblins?" she asked, slightly amused. This might turn out to be an eventful day after all.

"No," Jareth sighed in frustration. "Linzel, you wouldn't do it, you're not that idiotic!" he presumed.

"HEY!" Linzel cried.

"And I don't respond to the non-living," Jareth said and eyed the ghost that was staring. The blonde Fae turned to the other man in the hallway. "So you must have," Jareth paused. "You look familiar, have you been wished away before?"

"Um, I don't know. My brother told me stories about Jareth the Go-," Jareth stopped the man before he could continue.

"Please don't do that, it tends to backfire sometimes, in foreign places," he said. The man nodded.

"About you. I thought it was just his imagination."

"You know, for people who do magic and have their own society in a supposed unrealistic place, you don't have a very open mind," Linzel pointed out as she leaned against a stone wall. Alexandria then appeared around the corner.

"Hey I heard someone call!" she said.

"Man, you're kinda late with the obvious news," Linzel commented. "What we don't know is who are you people. You're not teachers, you would have been at the table and you're dead," she said bluntly.

"I'm R.J. Lupin," the blonde said and held out his hand to Linzel. She shrugged and shook his hand. (AN: HELP! What's Lupin's first name?!).Everyone turned to the ghost that was about to fall asleep in mid-air.

"Sirius Black," he answered. Alexandria gasped and ran up to him (almost running through him).

"OH MY GOD REALLY?!" she asked.

"In the flesh, well, um you get the point," he sighed. Jareth and Linzel were unfazed by the name. Of course they had heard the name, but when you're the Goblin King or the Lady of the Water you really don't need to care about fame.

"Harry has told me so much about you!" Alexandria said. Sirius became grim.

"How is he?" he asked sadly.

"He misses you, but he talks so highly of you. I swear they way he talks about you is almost like you would come to life just from his words!" she said excitedly. "Why don't you go and see him?"

"I can't," the melancholy ghost confessed. "I cant go to him like this, he expected me to be there for him," he said.

"Sirius, he didn't expect you to do anything. He wanted you to be his father, he loved you like one," Alexandria said and looked down at her watch, "Sorry gotta go, lunchtime and I promised some Slytherins that I would sit with them at lunch! Bye dad! Linzel! It was nice meeting you two, Lupin, Sirius!" she waved as she ran down the hallway and out of sight.

"Your daughter's got a way with words, Jareth, you gotta admit," Linzel said. Jareth smirked proudly.

"So, are you going to see Harry?" Lupin asked the floating man next to him. The ghost grumbled in return and went back to his thoughts. Jareth looked down at his watch (AN: Does he even have one? I wonder if it has thirteen numbers. hehehe (hit with popcorn and candy from readers) ALRIGHT! I'll stop!).

"I have to get back to class, I'll talk to you later Linzel," Jareth said and left the same way he showed up.

"HOW THE HELL CAN HE DO THAT ON SCHOOL GROUNDS?!" Lupin burst. Linzel laughed.

"Lupin, wizards and witches aren't allowed to apparate on school grounds. Am I correct?" both men nodded, "And witches and wizards can't half animus, can they?" she asked. They were not seeing where this was going.

"Yes, but what does that have to do with anything?" Sirius cut in. Linzel smiled and let her sky blue wings appear. The two men gaped.

"Who said we were witches or wizards?" Linzel smiled satisfied. She made her wings disappear again and walked off, leaving the two gaping people, werewolf and ghost, behind.

&&&&&

Authoress: Wow, am I glad that's over.

Zoe: DITTO!

Jareth: SAME HERE!

Authoress: Lazy Muse and Poof the Magic Drag Queen, over here.

Jareth: (eye twitch) What did you just say?

Zoe: This cannot end well…

Authoress: AHHHH (running away from furious Goblin King with crystals)

Zoe: (Watching with popcorn in hand) Anyway, she meant it, if you can give us Lupin's first name and a page you found it we'll give you a virtual candy bar and a sneak peek on the next chapter!

Authoress: (Stops in tracks) Hold on! Who promised that?!

Jareth: Uh oh! (runs into Authoress)

Zoe: COUPLES UPDATE!

Neville/ Alexandria- 1

Draco/ Alexandria- 1

Harry/ Alexandria- 0

The Infinity trio ( A, Z, and Jareth): (snicker-snicker)

Harry: SOD OFF!

Authoress: Poor Harry….Here (hands him scissors) Go ruin the sets of Lord of the Rings.

Harry: (lights up) YAY (runs away)

Zoe: NEXT COUPLE!

Linzel/ Lupin- 2

Linzel/ Sirius- 1 ½

Linzel/ Snape- 0

Zoe: No one likes Snape, do they?

Authoress: Nope

Jareth: REVIEW OR I'LL TIP INTO THE BOG!!

Z & A: SHUT UP POOFBOY!


	6. Meetings, Yelling, and Jinxed Candy Sell...

Authoress: Ok I read the latest reviews…

Zoe & Jareth: (rolling on floor laughing)

Authoress: Snapeykins? A reviewer called Snape, Snapeykins?

Zoe: (trying to catch breath) Oh man, that's great!

Jareth: It's almost as funny as the part of the Sailor Moon/HP crossover we read.

Authoress: Yeah, the author said that Voldemort was sitting in his recliner and thinking.

Zoe: I'm sorry but we have a slight problem picturing Voldy sitting in a RC Willey Recliner Plus….

Authoress: With deluxe cup holders…

The Infinity Trio: (burst out laughing)

Authoress: Anyway, thanks for the reviews though! We really do appreciate it!

Zoe: We now accept Anonymous, Visa, and American Express reviews.

Jareth: Right….

Disclaimer: Still don't own anything (Looks at watch) Still don't.

Authoress: In the words of the great and famous Monty Python!

The Infinity Trio: GET ON WITH IT!

Chapter 6

Meetings, Yelling, and Jinxed Candy Selling?

(Sounds like Fred and George are up to No Good)

Alexandria sat down at the Slytherin table with a smile. She sat across from Draco. Draco smiled (AN: WHAT THE -BEEP-?). Harry saw this but turned back around to his friends.

"I still don't see why a girl like that was put into Slytherin," Harry muttered. Hermione smiled knowingly. Ron only rolled his eyes and went back to eating (like that's new).

"I agree with Harry," Neville spoke up from next to Harry, "She seems so much nicer than everyone else in Slytherin," he said. Harry nodded. These two had a lot to learn about the Princess of Goblins.

"So, you going to join us in Potions?" Draco asked Alexandria as she bit into a roll hungrily. She swallowed and thought for a minute. She shrugged.

"Sure, I heard that Snape was a strict but good teacher," Alexandria commented. Some Slytherins around her stared at her for a minute. "WHAT?!" she almost yelled.

"Where did you hear that? I don't know of any student that likes Snape," a girl next to her whispered.

"The paintings," Alexandria answered. Some of the students giggled. "Alright if that's the way I'm going to be treated why am I staying here?" she frowned and got up. She left the Great Hall in a huff. She was stopped when someone called her name. She turned to see Draco calling after her. "What is it?" she asked impatiently.

"Don't listen to what those losers say," he said with a sneer back at the hall. "I didn't know you talked to the paintings. Usually the students don't talk back to them," he changed the subject, partly because he didn't know where the conversation was going.

"Yeah well you tend to talk to stuff when you come from the L-," she caught herself. "Um, from where I come from," she completed her sentence. "So what do you think of Proffesor Snape," Alexandria asked.

"Jerk," Linzel said as she approached the two surprised students.

"And why do you say that Professor Trannen" Alexandria asked slyly.

"I caught two redheaded boys making some sort of candy and they offered me a piece. I accepted and ate it. Of course it was jinxed and my hair turned bright blue," she said. "I changed it back easily and let the boys off with a warning. I can remember a spoiled brat playing tricks too," Linzel said and thought of how she and Jareth had played tricks on their parents, easily. "The professor saw the whole thing and gave the two a whole week of detention. That man has no fun!" she pouted, which looked weird on a teacher.

"You'll live," Alexandria said and smiled to her friend. Linzel then noticed Draco. "Oh hello again! How are you?" she asked friendly.

"Fine thanks," he answered coolly.

"Are you two coming to my class on Saturday?" she asked. 'Better say yes runt!' she thought. Alexandria giggled and nodded.

"Why not, I really don't have anything else to do on Saturday," Draco answered.

"Thank you for being so enthusiastic about it," Linzel retorted and continued down the hallway.

"She is as bad as me sometimes," Alexandria said as she shook her head. Draco looked to the redhead next to him, questionably. "Don't ask," she said. The two then walked off to Potions.

$& Potions $&

(oh joy)

"Welcome to another year of Potions," Snape said not too enthusiastically. "As always we will not be using our wands in this class," he instructed and ignored the sighs of some students. He then noticed the girl sitting next to Draco. "Do we have another Weasley in the class?" he asked. This ticked off the only Weasley in the class.

"No, Professor, I'm Alexandria Spiritello. The new DADA teacher's daughter," she answered with a cool demeanor. She hit a soft spot at mentioning the position that Snape didn't (and probably never) have.

"Well then you must know a little more about magic than some of the students here know about," he assumed. "Can you tell me the difference between the white unicorns and the black?" he asked, thinking she would be speechless.

"You mean besides the color?" she asked smartly. He glared. "The black unicorns are more rare and have a gold colored horn, while the white one have a silver colored horn. The white come near only virgins, the black do not associate with humans at all," she answered his question perfectly.

"Then you know that their horns-" Snape began.

"The white unicorn's horn is perfect for healing potions and the black unicorn's is used in the most deadly of poisons," she said. She smirked at his empty expression. The students in the class either, were very surprised or tried to suppress their laughter.

"Very good, Miss Spiritello, this class might learn something from you this year. Ten points to Slytherin," he said. Some Gryffindors glared at the new Slytherin. She looked away form their glaring faces. Hermione elbowed Ron when he threw a glare at Alexandria.

With that the class got to their lesson, Unicorn Potions.

## Meanwhile ##

"Oh, it's you," Linzel said as she looked up at the person she bumped into. Remus frowned.

"Sorry to disturb you by simply walking down the hallway," he said and started walking again. Linzel stopped him.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Lupin. I'm just in a bad mood. Sorry that I took it out on you. It's just that Professor-"

"Snape?" he asked. She laughed and nodded. She retold her story to the old DADA teacher as the walked towards the courtyard of the school (AN: Can you call it that?).

"Yeah he's always been kind of stingy," he said with a sour expression.

"Let me guess," someone interrupted and the two looked to see Sirius. "You two are talking about Snape," the ghost said. The two nodded.

"You two knew him?" Linzel asked.

"We used to go to Hogwarts with him," Lupin said as he recalled the memories.

"We, of course, were the troublemakers of the school," Sirius said. The rest of the afternoon the three conversed about times they had caused mischief in their homes and at school. They seemed to have quite a lot in common.

Dinner

"So how was your second day?" Linzel asked Jareth as he sat down. He saw his daughter sit down with the white/ blonde haired boy from the train station.

"It was fine, considering all the students questioning me about my experience. It seems this so called job is jinxed," he said and began eating. Linzel laughed quietly. "They some how convinced me to restart the dueling club and direct it," he conversed. Linzel smiled.

"Can I join?" she asked excitedly. "Then get Snape to join so I can kick his a-"

"Pass the rolls please," Jareth interrupted before she made a fool of herself. Lucky for her Snape sat at the other end of the table. "Join, I can't stop you," She clapped happily. "But you're not using Snape as a punching bag," he told her. She slumped in her seat.

"No one stops you from using the goblins as one," she muttered.

"Actually, Ginny told me to stop that after the first month we were married," he said. Linzel rolled her eyes and looked to Alexandria.

"They grow older so fast," she sighed.

"I was on my own at eighteen, and you at seventeen. Why does this scene surprise you?" Jareth asked. Linzel play punched him.

"And yet you are still spoiled," she said and got up as she finished her meal. Jareth smirked as she walked away. The second day did got a lot better.

&&&&&&&&&&&&

Authoress: Don't worry I won't go through every single day of the year.

Jareth and Zoe: PHEW!

Authoress: Shut it. Anyway, Faith Maguire and GrumpyGills, you guys were right. I actually just forgot. Sorry but I really can't give you a sneak peek off anything… (glares at Zoe)

Zoe: WHAT?!

Authoress: Tosses the two reviewers candy bars! But If you two review again I'll let you have two votes for anyone you want. That means if you want to vote for Lupin then I'll put two points for him! That goes for both couples.

Jareth: Make a harder question! I could've given you the answer!

Authoress: FINE! Here's a hard one. When the Firebolt was still a 'prototype' the proprietor boasted that it that the Irish International Side's had ordered a certain number of them. What was the number?

Zoe: Hehehehe….

Jareth: Couples!

Linzel/ Snape- 2

Linzel/ Lupin- 2

Linzel/ Sirius- 1 ½

Authoress: Wow, Serverus caught up fast…

Zoe: Surprising. And don't worry Linzel hates him at first, they'll learn to like each other.

Jareth: Yeah, yeah. Next!

Alexandria/ Harry- 0

Alexandria/ Draco- 3

Alexandria/ Neville- 1

Zoe: Does anybody like the Boy-who-Lived?

Audience: (silence)

Authoress: Guess not, sorry Potter

Harry: (Grumble)

Jareth: REVIEW!!!

Authoress: PLEASE!


	7. The Day in the Life of a Fae

Authoress: I really am not in the mood for comedy right now. Partly because two reviewers decided it was really fun to insult not only me, but also my work. I'm sorry but right now I'm just writing. By- the-way good job on the answer to the question last chapter you two. You two are die-hard HP fans, I can tell! You two are cheering me up!

Disclaimer: I own a bed, TV, and a computer. Oh and a couple of characters, but not the ones from Laby or HP…..

Chapter 7

A Day in the Life of Fae

"Good morning class. I'll make the first day brief so you all can go somewhere else as fast as you can," Linzel said to her quite large class. The largeness of it surprised her. She counted quickly. "Wow, 46, that quite a good turnout," she mumbled.

The class took place in a large lecture-type class room. In front was almost a stage but was no higher than the ground. Burgundy-colored drapes hung over the windows, giving the room a slightly darker look. Linzel pulled out her wand.

"This class was designed to teach each one of you a special way of using you wand and/or magic to produce art," she explained. "Such as, painting, drawing, or dance," she set her wand down on her desk. "It takes a lot of time to master the magic of movement," she said. She raised her hands and they glowed. She slowly turn while her hands were in the air, with a graceful twirl.

The glowing of her hands turned to a blue color. Light came off her hands and seemed to follow her movement (Think of ribbons when dancing). Again she twirled and waved her hands in slowly. The magic swirled around her in shades of blue. It formed confusing patterns and curves.

"That, is what it means to dance with magic. Unless you want to be literal," Linzel waved her hands quickly and the magic formed a figure. It was a man but you couldn't tell he had any complexion or real shape. Linzel put one of her hands on the shoulder of the figure and the other in 'his' hand. They danced for a moment. Doing various ballroom steps. The students were mesmerized.

The figure dipped her and then….. SLAM! The door to the room opened suddenly. Linzel lost her concentration and dropped to the floor. The magical figure disappearing. Jareth stepped into the room. The students were giggling. He then saw Linzel on the floor.

"I have got to fix that door," she muttered and hoisted herself up. Jareth smirked and made his way to the back of the class. Linzel brushed herself off. "Now, the headmaster told me that I would have to tell you a whole bunch of history on magic in art," the students all groaned. "But I've never been one for following the rules. If you are all good than we won't make this a history class," and there was much rejoicing! %&%&%&%

The students raced out of the classroom in a hurry. Some went to go tell their friends about the new class, some to just have fun.

"Just think," Jareth began as he walked towards Linzel as she cleaned up her desk. "A whole year of teaching under-aged wizards," Linzel gave him a look that said 'Stop while your ahead'.

"I was thinking and I believe it's going to be very interesting," she said with a satisfied smile. "Weren't you on your way to talk to Snape about the dueling club?"

"I was?" Jareth asked, teasing her.

"Jareth! You said you would make him join and then I could show him what kind of magic people from the Underground have!" she whined.

"Whining doesn't suit you, Linzel," he said with a frown. "But I will talk to Professor Snape about joining the Dueling club. God knows he wants to take a few hits at me for getting the job he'll never have," Jareth said and headed for the door.

"WAIT JARETH!" she called him back, "When do we get to tell the students where we're from?" she asked.

"Before you duel Snape. As a simple warning to the unfortunate bloke," he said evilly.

"We are beginning to sound like we did when we were teenagers," Linzel commented. Jareth sighed.

"Those were the days," he said. There was a long silence.

"Thank god that's over," they both said and went their separate ways.

- - - - - - - - -

Snape was writing grades down on scrolls, from students that were cursed to do Summer homework, when Jareth entered. Snape looked up to who it was and scowled.

"What do you want?" he asked, a little peeved.

"Oh I wanted to ask if you would join the dueling club," Jareth said simply. Snape put down his quill and looked Jareth in the eye.

"And why would I do a thing like that?" the potions teachers asked.

"Well, Professor Linzel seemed happy enough to join. We had also heard that you were an excellent duelist. So naturally, she was curious as to how well you are," Jareth said, hiding a smirk at Snape curious face.

"Fine, I'll join. Please tell Professor Linzel that I would gladly duel her," Snape said with pride in his voice.

'This is too easy,' Jareth thought. "I'll be sure to do that, thank you Professor," Jareth then took his leave. He wore a smirk the rest of the day. He was a master of conniving.

- - - - - - -

Alexandria walked about the corridors, heading towards the library. Draco saw her and followed her. When she got to the library he called her name.

"Alexandria! Hey why are you going to the library on a Saturday?" Draco asked as he caught up.

"Why not? And please call my Alex, Alexandria gets old," she said. "Actually I'm looking up something for my father," she told him as they entered the quiet room filled with books.

"What are you looking up?" he asked, very curious.

"Why so nosey all of a sudden?" she asked with a raised eyebrow.

"I-I, well I just, um," he stuttered. Alex laughed and smiled reassuringly.

"Save your breath Draco, I'm just kidding," she said and walked to a sections of the library. Draco looked around and saw that they were in the fairytale/ myths section.

"We are learning about Fae this year right?" Draco asked as he looked around. Alex nodded and pulled out a large book. On the cover were drawings of faeries, goblins, and Pegasus. "A fairy tale book?"

"Fae are supposed to mythical, are they not?" she asked him. He shrugged and followed her to a nearby table. She laid out the book and opened the cover. On the inside was the title **Mythical Beings From the Underground**. Alexandria smiled and flipped to the table of contents. She dragged her finger done the list looking for things. "Fae! There they are!" she turned the pages until she got to the chapter.

"It says here that, 'Fae were the first people in the Underground or other world beyond the mortal realm. The Fae are the rulers of the land there and have lived there many millennia. Fae are said to be immortal and can only be killed by iron.'" Alex quoted.

"I wonder what it's like to be immortal," Draco pondered as he sat back in his chair. 'Utterly boring after a millennia or two,' Alex thought to herself, remembering what her father had told her.

"Well, I'm going to take this book to dad. What to come?" she asked and stood up with the book. Draco nodded and followed the red head.

- - - - - - - -

Authoress: The end of Chapter 7. Thanks for those of you who reviewed the nice way!

Faith Maquire

GrumpyGills

Twin Kats

Allgoodfungall247

Amazonian21

Authoress: And for you flamers…

Cassandra Anthemyst - Just because I didn't do a JS fic does not give you the right to flame me! I actually liked one of the stories you did, but now I'm not so sure…

Spiletta42- I happen to like comedy. As for the AN's in the story they are funny and you know it! Ask the people up there!

Couples:

Alex/ Draco- 6

Alex/ Neville- 1

Alex/ Harry- 0

Linzel/Snape- 6

Linzel/Lupin- 2

Linzel/Sirius- 1 ½

Authoress: Seeya next chapter!


	8. A Month Later

Authoress: Sorry for not updating in a while!

Jareth: (Runs across yelling, in nothing but his boxers) WHER ARE THEY!

Authoress: WHAT THE HELL?!

Zoe: YO JARETH!

Jareth: (Stops) WHAT?!

Authoress: Hey what's with the skivvies? (FYI: Slang for Underwear)

Zoe: You know, any other Labyrinth crazed girl would love to be in our positions, but we are not fazed a bit by Jareth….

Authoress: What? You think all the girls that watch Labyrinth are in it just for the plot?

Audience: (Silence)

Zoe: We didn't think so….

Jareth: I can't find my tights!!

Authoress: That's it? Oh, ok, well on with the Show!

Disclaimer: Don't own Laby-kins!

Water on the Brain

A Month Later….

"Now I expect a lot of you at Dueling club this evening," Jareth said in front of the class. "Professor Snape and Professor Linzel will be assisting me at that time. And I believe there was a challenged issued between them," he let out.

This caught the attention of many of the students. The made plans to see the duel. Rumors were going around the school at the speed of, well, magic.

"I heard that Professor Linzel was a Dueling champion in America."

"Well, I heard she has special powers to invoke the dead."

"I heard that she sucked."

"NO! I heard she and Snape were bitter rivals."

Linzel sat in her office laughing to herself. Jareth entered with a curious look on his face. She tried to calm herself.

"Have you heard these rumors?" she said between laughs. 

"Yes, and it seems you are taking it very well," Jareth pointed out. "Don't forget what you have to tell the students before you duel Snape," Jareth said. Linzel got quiet.

"Kill-joy," she grumbled.

"What? You think I'm here to support everyone?" Jareth asked.

"Well you can at least show some for me," she growled and gathered up some books "I'll see you at the Dueling club!" she said exited the room.

Chatter was heard all over the school as the time neared for the Dueling to begin. Even some teachers were curious about the new substitutes. Dumbledore kept that face of indifference as everyone gathered for dueling club. He was excited too, but there was no need to overreact, like many of his students.

Everything was set up in the Great Hall. Tables were set up next to each other to form the dueling 'Arena', so to speak. Snape was smirking, remembering how he beat that wanna-be four years ago. Oh what a day that was.

"Now, we will begin the dueling in ten minutes. Some students signed up over the week to duel each other. The contestants playing each other are as followed: Draco Malfoy versus Harry Potter (No surprise there), Alexandria Spiritello versus Peeves (Big Surprise, seriously), Neville Longbottom versus Ron Weasley (Challeng issued as friends, or in other words for fun), and Professor Snape versus Professor Linzel," Jareth read all this off a parchment.

"Alex, you're taking on Peeves?" Hermione asked.

"That jerk dumped a whole bucket of red ink on me. He's going to pay," Alex said through clenched teeth.

"WHAT?!," Ron and Neville said when they heard the names on the list. There were some laughs and glares.

Harry and Draco were locked in the glaring contest of the century. It took a nudge from Alex to stop Harry. Draco winked at Alex and she blushed slightly. This was the last straw for Harry. 'He's going down' Harry thought darkly.

Sarah stood on the away from the crowded tables and leaned against a wall. She laughed as she noticed the two boys glaring at each other.

"Remind you of anyone?" Linzel asked as she walked up beside the brown-haired woman. Sarah blushed.

"I'll admit it, I was a brat at that age. It's what we seem to do. Glare at the enemy," she shrugged. "Hey, it's all I could do when Jareth showed up. Glare, glare glare. It reminded me of the saying, 'Careful, your face might get stuck that way,'."

"No kidding. So you here just in case Neville hurts himself?" Linzel asked.

"No, I'm here to make sure the three Fae in the room don't kill the mortals," Sarah said.

"Don't worry," Jareth said coming up to the two. "Peeves is a poltergeist, and Snape will be learning a good lesson. You're lucky I'm not dueling him," Jareth said.

"Yeah, yeah. The Bog of Eternal Stench. We've hear it all, Jareth! Go sing to someone else! Like the waiting students!" Linzel pushed him towards the tables.

"Students and faculty, we will now begin with the dueling. To start us off are Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter," the two stepped up to him. (AN: Have any of you seen Zoolander? This reminds me of that one part David Bowie is in). "Please limit it to mostly charms, we don't want blood everywhere," Jareth told the two and they nodded, never taking their eyes off each other.

The two adversaries walked to their sides of the dueling stage. They pointed their wands towards the ceiling in respect for each other and on the count of three the duel began. One, two, three! (AN: I'm not very good at this dueling thing so please bear with me)

Draco wasted no time at all. He muttered some words and a yellow light shot of his wand. The charm hit Harry square in the stomach and knocked the wind of him. He stumbled back, but soon regained composure. He ducked as another charm just missed him. He pointed his wand at Draco.

"Himaldris Trinity," Harry yelled and a green light shot from his wand. The light seemed to come together and form three swords of light. The charm hit Draco. He felt a quick and sharp pain hit him in the stomach and arms. He almost lost his wand.

"This is going to go on forever," Linzel muttered as she watch a black streak go from Draco's wand. And the duel did go on. After about a half an hour Jareth broke up the duel.

"Gentlemen we only have a little time. Let's just call this match a draw," he said as he stepped between the two. The two threw each other glares and got off the podium. Jareth sighed.

"Alright, now we have Ron Weasley and Neville Longbottom," he announced. Ron got up but Neville didn't.

"Sorry to waste your time Professor, but someone put our names on the list as a prank," Ron said. Jareth glared. Linzel shot a nasty look to the two laughing Weasley twins.

"Alright, if anyone else wants to waste our time, they can come up here and duel me," Jareth threatened and Linzel held in her laughter. The students kept silent. Jareth raised the parchment and looked down. "Alexandria and Peeves," he said. Peeves flew through the wall and positioned himself at the end of table.

"So I'm challenging a little child huh?" he asked.

"Careful, Peeves, that child is my daughter," Jareth said quietly as he walked by him. Peeves paled considerably. Peeves knew who Jareth was. He had cousins in the Underground.

"You are going to pay," Alexandria said and whipped out her wand. The duel started. Peeves gathered a little ball of magic in his hand and sent it a Alexandria.

"Yetra Guardrem," she said and a black streak shot out of her wand and hit the little ball of magic. The ball exploded and little sparkles fell to the floor. At that point Peeves started to float away.

"That cowards trying to run away," a student said out loud.

"Oh no you don't," Alexandria said. "Ornate Spectrum!" she shouted. Out of her wand a white light came and zoomed towards Peeves. It hit peeves and he immediately turned to silver. He shrunk to the sized of a necklace pendant.

"Anybody want a Peeves necklace?" Linzel asked, amused.

"Don't worry, he'll turn back in about a week," Alexandria said and pocketed her wand. She went to the end of the table, jumped up, and grabbed the Peeves charm out of the air. She landed on the floor and tossed Filch the charm. "You like revenge?" she asked. Filch smirked and hobbled off.

"Now, the last duel is Professor Snape against Professor Linzel," Jareth said and quickly got off the podium. He walked over to Dumbledore and said something to him, but none of the students heard. Dumbledore nodded and Jareth smiled evilly.

"Uh oh," Sarah said sarcastically.

Authoress: CLIFFIES ARE GREAT!

Zoe: Yeah, yeah sure

Jareth: Just get to the couples!

Authoress: THE VOTES SO FAR!

Linzel/ Snape- 7

Linzel/ Sirius- 1 1/2

Linzel/ Lupin- 2

Alex/ Draco- 7

Alex/ Neville- 1

Alex/Harry- 0

Authoress: I'm really starting to think about taking wonder boy off the list.

Jareth: Fans probably wouldn't care

Zoe: No kidding

Authoress: I have a question! Anybody here a Anime fan? Cuz I might post my Sailor Moon/ Laby crossover.

Jareth: God help us!

Zoe: Hey, I'm in that one!

Authoress: Love to hear you comments!

Zoe: Your good ones of course!

All: PLEASE REVIEW!


	9. A Real Duel

Authoress: (smiles Evilly) This will be fun!

Zoe: Help us!

Jareth: RUN AWAY!

Authoress: You two shut up.

The Two: Yes ma'am

Authoress: That's better. On with the Show!

Disclaimer: I don't own Labyrinth or Harry Potter. The characters should be very glad!

Water on the Brain

It's a Real Duel

"Ladies, gentlemen, students, and children," Jareth announced, "We need to inform you all before the next exciting duel begins."

"Laying it on thick, are we Jareth?" Linzel muttered.

"I believe I was told of Hogwarts' history of DADA teachers. It seems the position warrants people of very… unique personalities. I am no exception to this tradition and neither is my friend," Jareth said motioning to Linzel, who took a bow.

"It seems Dumbledore has welcomed three people that are not wizard or witch," Linzel said with a smile. "Nor muggle," she snapped before any of the Slytherins could say anything. Her teardrop started to glow (AN: Remember? The one on her forehead?). Pretty soon her whole outfit turn into light blue slacks, a aqua marine halter top and the ribbons that were on her arms before.

Jareth produced a crystal and threw it up in the air and it burst into a thousand pieces of glitter. On Alexandria's head a gold tiara formed. She growled and took it off her head. Jareth outfits turned to the one black one he had when he first met Sarah.

"Now who's ready to duel?" Linzel asked. Her hair had gained a bluish tint. She looked to Snape smugly. Snape was stunned to say the least. With a flick of her wrist her wand appeared. "In the Underground I'm referred to as the Lady of Water," she announced, but it was mostly for Snape's benefit.

"Could you just get on with the duel, Linzel?" Jareth asked impatiently.

"Kill-joy," Linzel huffed and stepped up to her starting point, while Snape, knocked out of his stupor, stepped up to his.

"I hope I don't singe your hair," Snape said. He had obviously regained the cockiness.

"Don't worry, Professor Snape, I'm a big girl. A few centuries old actually," she commented. Jareth gave the go.

"Nigrum Lacerare," Snape started off. A black shot of a spell raced towards Linzel. It wrapped around her and she seemed to be paralyzed. Her face held no emotion as Snape smirked. "Giving up already? That's only one spell," he asked.

"Latin? Oh, yes that's right, you European wizards prefer Latin for spells," Linzel seemed to ignore the black rope tied around her that kept her from moving. "Well, if you want to play that way," she shrugged and the spell dissipated. Snape's jaw dropped. "Tumultuosum Somnium Unda," Linzel said carefully. The table shook and a large wave came from her wand. It crashed into Snape and sent him flying.

After shaking himself from the shock he stood up. Linzel stood waiting patiently. Anger grew in his body. 'Anger will blind you, mortal,' Linzel thought as she sensed the anger.

"Leonis Flammae," he yelled. Flamed colored streaks went towards Linzel. Landing in front of her it turned into a flaming lion. Though it was not as large as the lions you might see in a zoo, it intimidated Linzel.

"Uh-oh," Jareth said under his breath.

"What?" Sarah asked.

"Linzel may be the water Queen, but she has a fear of fire," Jareth said. Sarah turned back to the duel in anxiousness. Linzel was starting to back away from the advancing lion.

"Nymphae," Linzel hissed at it and pointed her wand. Instead of a shot a small blue light glowed at the end of her wand. It floated over to the lion and took form. A small body and wings could be seen. The audience heard a giggle, like a tinkle of bells, and then water surrounded the lion. The fire was quickly smoldered.

"Scared of a little flame?" Snape called from the other end of the dueling table. It was Linzel's turn to get mad. She took a deep breath, but was too late.

"Umbra Lamina," Snape said and five shot of black flew towards Linzel. Half way there they changed to short swords made of black fire.

With no time to counteract Linzel jumped up into the air, performed a little twist and landed ten feet behind her original position. The spell was about to hit her back when she turned and the spell disappeared.

"It didn't work?" someone shouted out.

"No, look!" another shouted and pointed. In Linzel's hand was a crystal with five black streaks floating around in it. . What the mortal eye had failed to notice (Jareth, Alexandria, and a certain headmaster noticed) was that, while in the air, Linzel materialized a small blue crystal.

"Mortal magic has no effect on a Fae's crystal," Linzel said.

"This is unfair. You used Fae magic," Snape protested. Sarah had to hold down giggles at Snape's first sentence. Jareth raised an eyebrow.

"Technically, Professor, the dueling rules say nothing about Fae magic," Neville spoke up, surprising quite a lot of people. Snape looked to be at a loss of words, but then regained composure.

"Well, then her wand is not in possession so she has lost," Snape pointed out again.

"Ah, ah, ah," Linzel interrupted and pointed up. The little water faerie from before was holding, delicately in her hands, Linzel's wand. "Nymphae, the Latin word for water fairy. Once summoned by me she does my bidding. While you were calling your blades I told her to catch my wand," the Water queen smirked in triumph. Then she looked down at the spell in the crystal.

"Catch!" She said and threw it at Snape. Snape didn't have time to react before five blades smashed into him. His wand flew from his hand and the duel was over. Sarah rushed to assistance.

"Sarah don't bother," Linzel said coming up next to the fallen Potions Master. "Salutaris Aestus," she whispered. Snape felt a cold rush go through his body and the unseen wound stopped hurting.

"He'll be fine in the morning," Linzel said and stood up to face the class. "Now who's coming to my next lesson on Saturday?" Hands shot up so fast that nobody, not even fae, could count. "That's a good number," Linzel breathed.

-------------------------------

Authoress: For those of you who haven't got the message I haven't updated cuz I've been moving

Zoe: Finally! The internet is back!

Jareth: Damn, now it's back to the stories

Authoress: Yup! And if I get enough reviews I'll tell you the Latin translations of the spells the two used!

All: PLEASE REVIEW!!


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